“This flower reminds me of friends and happy childhood, even though it was during the cultural revolution”
My interview with Hu Laoshi (Betty Hu) was by far the most emotional interview out of the entire project. Her early childhood was similar to my other interviewees, being that they did not have many sports equipment, so the player with what they could find. But I want to spend my time talking about the trauma she endured at such a young age and how that has shaped who she is today. If you know anything about Chinese history, you probably know about the Cultural Revolution, a time period Hu Laoshi is all too familiar with. Her father was born into a wealthy family; they owned about 180 acres and 56 houses on that plot of land, so Mao's New China said her father is a Di Zhu. Di Zhu is the highest social class, but of course, during this time period, you did not want to be considered a Di Zhu. It was interesting to learn that her father worked for the government, the government that ultimately ruined his family's lives through the horrors of the Cultural Revolution. I said to her that it is not right that they would treat their workers so terrible, she quickly responded saying, "Everything is not right with the cultural revolution.” Since about sophomore year I was aware that Hu Laoshi has lived through Mao's reign and understood her negative critiques on China's government, but I was not aware of just how much she had to go through at such a young age. She was only six when it started, and she had to grow up a lot in a short amount of time. She told me she “was a father, mother, and sister" to her siblings and it was hard. She noted though, that those trying times are what built her character saying, "that’s why I have a really strong personality." The toughest thing to hear her talk about was her family, especially her relationship with her mom and maternal grandfather. The particular story that involves her mom is in the audio file below, so I will not explain it in detail, but I do want to comment on her grandfather. Her grandfather also had the status of a Di Zhu; because of this, her mother was a target during the Cultural Revolution. She told me as a young girl until even after the revolution was over, she had a deep resentment towards her grandfather. In her mind, this was the man that caused my mom so much pain. She told him multiple times, “Because of you my mother suffered.” Reflecting back on her actions with tears in her eyes she told me, “At that point, I didn’t feel bad, but after a few years I realized what really happened with the cultural revolution and I feel really bad. My mom wrote to me and said your grandfather passed away. At that point, I was really sad. I was so sorry. I promise one day when I come back to liudiyuan; I will bring his soul too, I promise." I did not know what to think or say after hearing this; I was just so grateful that she trusted me with such an emotional and powerful story. She could've stuck to the facts, but she made a choice to open up to me. Her words so touch me.
Another testament to how strong Hu Laoshi is is the educational system she went through during the Cultural Revolution. Virtually all the teachers and intellectuals were sent to farms or the countryside, leaving inadequate resources for schools. Textbooks were exchanged for Mao's little red book and classes replaced with learning how to fix a tractor. Not only was her education interrupted, but her culture was as well. See, during this time all the traditional Chinese culture was wiped away. I asked her how her family celebrated Duan Wu Jie, the Dragon Boat festival, she responded saying , “We didn’t have that, because at that time after Cultural Revolution, all that culture was not coming back yet.” But one aspect of the culture that was present no matter what was the respect for the elderly. A very common practice among Asain and Hispanic cultures, as I have learned the past month. Hu Laoshi even went as far as to say “I think people value family more than here.” A bold statement in my opinion, but I think she has a point. But I think the question is to what extent is it a cultural difference or generational difference?
Hu Laoshi's decision to immigrate was heavily based on her husband's career. They had reached a point where they were not making enough money and the Chinese policies were making it difficult to do business, so it was time to leave. He applied for an F2 visa to study at Georgia State University. She informed me that the F2 visa stipulates that after you finish your studies, you must return to China, but because of the Tiananmen Square Massacre, the US government granted him and her amnesty. I asked her if she ever sees herself moving back to China, she said she doesn't want to because "The government always tells you lies, and the people always tell lies.” She knows she can't live with that kind of government, but I was wondering if America's style of government outways the other downsides of American culture, i.e., discrimination. It's definitely a little touchy to ask people about events they'd probably rather forget, but I think it's an important part of the story to tell. We are a country built by immigrants, yet so many disrespect them because they cannot get past appearances. Her personal experience with discrimination is silent, meaning nothing is ever spoken; it's all in the looks. She said, “It’s hard to say. I mean sometimes you just have the feeling... They don’t say anything, but you can feel it, even at Lovett. ” I wasn't surprised by her answer, many of my interviewees felt the same way. I think growing up with my background I've developed a "radar" for it too, not necessarily regarding discrimination towards me, but definitely towards my mom and grandmother. And what Hu Laoshi said is extremely accurate, nothing is said, but you can see the eyes as they watch, the brow as it furrows, the voices shift octives as if they are talking to a child. Anyway, she ended our conversation telling me "When people ask me what word comes to mind when you think of America, I think "son" because if I lived in China with the one-child policy, I wouldn’t have him."
Another testament to how strong Hu Laoshi is is the educational system she went through during the Cultural Revolution. Virtually all the teachers and intellectuals were sent to farms or the countryside, leaving inadequate resources for schools. Textbooks were exchanged for Mao's little red book and classes replaced with learning how to fix a tractor. Not only was her education interrupted, but her culture was as well. See, during this time all the traditional Chinese culture was wiped away. I asked her how her family celebrated Duan Wu Jie, the Dragon Boat festival, she responded saying , “We didn’t have that, because at that time after Cultural Revolution, all that culture was not coming back yet.” But one aspect of the culture that was present no matter what was the respect for the elderly. A very common practice among Asain and Hispanic cultures, as I have learned the past month. Hu Laoshi even went as far as to say “I think people value family more than here.” A bold statement in my opinion, but I think she has a point. But I think the question is to what extent is it a cultural difference or generational difference?
Hu Laoshi's decision to immigrate was heavily based on her husband's career. They had reached a point where they were not making enough money and the Chinese policies were making it difficult to do business, so it was time to leave. He applied for an F2 visa to study at Georgia State University. She informed me that the F2 visa stipulates that after you finish your studies, you must return to China, but because of the Tiananmen Square Massacre, the US government granted him and her amnesty. I asked her if she ever sees herself moving back to China, she said she doesn't want to because "The government always tells you lies, and the people always tell lies.” She knows she can't live with that kind of government, but I was wondering if America's style of government outways the other downsides of American culture, i.e., discrimination. It's definitely a little touchy to ask people about events they'd probably rather forget, but I think it's an important part of the story to tell. We are a country built by immigrants, yet so many disrespect them because they cannot get past appearances. Her personal experience with discrimination is silent, meaning nothing is ever spoken; it's all in the looks. She said, “It’s hard to say. I mean sometimes you just have the feeling... They don’t say anything, but you can feel it, even at Lovett. ” I wasn't surprised by her answer, many of my interviewees felt the same way. I think growing up with my background I've developed a "radar" for it too, not necessarily regarding discrimination towards me, but definitely towards my mom and grandmother. And what Hu Laoshi said is extremely accurate, nothing is said, but you can see the eyes as they watch, the brow as it furrows, the voices shift octives as if they are talking to a child. Anyway, she ended our conversation telling me "When people ask me what word comes to mind when you think of America, I think "son" because if I lived in China with the one-child policy, I wouldn’t have him."